Team light skinned!!

Since I can remember I have been infatuated with Leonardo DiCaprio and Jim Carey. Whenever I watch a TV show I am more attracted to the preppy white guys. But when I'm actually face to face with a hunky Caucasian I don't feel that spark, and I tend to gravitate towards the the light skinned black guys. To give you  a good visual, he would look similar to Drake.

Loved Aubrey before he was "Drake"

His smile melts my...heart :x

last night after meeting a friend of a friend, a tall light skinned guy with an adorable face I knew. I knew I had a type. Thinking about it now he resembled Drake a liiiiiiitle bit. Now forgive me if this post sounds a tad racist, it's totally not. And I am Native American and Irish, black and white, so I have permission to speak openly about this topic without offending anyone lol. So like I was saying  I don't know why but I just don't "click" with white guys, and believe me I've tried. It's easy befriending them but once they start to flirt something inside me just freezes up. I don't know what to talk about anymore. I start to not like their cologne for some reason, and I avoid them. Then when I see them again I try to hook them up with my friends.

So, coming to said conclusion I'm trying to embrase this realization. What type of guy do I want. I like black guys yes, however I do not like a thug or 'ghetto" guy. So when I meet a white guy who resembles Eminem I am completely turned off. My ex was a darker black guy, yes black he would say himself, but he spoke very well and loves musical theater songs among other untypical "black things".  I like a guy who is somewhat established and has goals. They also have to have a sense of humor, but who isn't looking for that.

Michael B. Jordan is already hot, but we all know just how much more sexy humor makes a man

I'm still trying to figure it out, and being a newly single woman I have time.But  I don't know I just can't picture myself marrying a white guy. Now that I've admitted it, I'll leave all that white chocolate goodness for you ladies. If you see anyone who resembles these guys hook a sistah up!!

Michael Ealy has an unfair advantage with those eyes. Then he takes off his shirt
GAME OVER!

Trey Songs sang at my prom and yes it's possible to look better in person.

Family member a.k.a Designated friends

It's funny how some family members can be complete strangers. I can't stand family reunions for that exact reason. Your expected to hang out with people you haven't seen in years, and sometimes people you would never chose to hang out with other wise. Trying to figure out what to talk about when some guy comes walking over asking the million dollar question "You remember me, I remember when you used to be this (insert hand measurement here) small". Ugh NO, don't embarrass us both please.
But it's sad when someone you used to be so close with becomes that distant cousin. Me my cousin and my sister used to be inseparable when we were younger. She got on my nerves I must admit, but I loved her regardless and we had tons of fun together. But when we got old age separated us, and her and my sister who are the same age hung out more. I was stuck in the mommy role in their eyes and they've kept a lot of stuff from me, it was weird.
Today we had a heart to heart though by admitting similar problems we have in our lives, both going through annoying "breaks" with our boyfriends and tons of stuff just came gushing out, and it was like how it used to be. FINALLY! I'm so happy I missed her, and to think it was that easy to let your guard down.
But then it's always like that with family. Your family members are the only ones in life who have to love you no matter what, and most of the time they want to lol. Your going to be with them forever, their the ones who will stick around no matter what. It's important to know who your related to, but really know them. They have your back always, and a lot of good memories to be made with. So  spend that time getting to know them, their worth it ;)


Love ya'll,
Monique Tiara
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Autimojazz <3

It gets better I promise....well thats what I've heard.

                "Losing you was like losing a tooth, I feel the hole where it once was
                                                       but I got used to it"


Those were the saddest words I've ever read in my life, and I just couldn't understand how it was so easy for my ex-best friend to dismiss our friendship so well. Ehh well I mean shit went down and I take full responsibility but I had always hoped things would come around, like it just had to happen. But unfortunately it didn't, and looking back at the situation now I can say things worked out the way they needed too. It wasn't entirely healthy for us to hold on to our friendship. Now I find that same quote running through my mind a lot these days, because my boyfriend and I are currently on a break. In the beginning I was a complete and utter mess. I couldn't listen to any type of song, sad or happy. I didn't want to tell any one because I didn't want it to be real. I was miserable for a week, until I finally told a friend about it, and it was such a relief. She advised to keep myself busy, to get my mind off of it. Recipe for success, I've come to love my space, being alone to do whatever I want. Leaving the light on at night to read without worrying about keeping my boyfriend up all night. Don't get me wrong, we did not break up on bad terms, and he was an amazing boyfriend, but it was his choice for the break up. It's hard being the dumpy as opposed to the dumper, I didn't know how to deal. But like every other problem we have, it eventually passes. And like losing a tooth you get used to it's absence, and then fill the hole with something better. What do you guys do after an awful break up, I'm still not entirely fixed,ha.


Love ya'll,
Monique Tiara

Whats in a Name

So I threw three at you poor souls. Confuzzled? Sorry. I'm currently finding myself at the moment. You'd think after all these years in school I would have a pretty clear view of who I am, but it's foggy. First off my birth name is Monique, pretty french name. But I've met so many with the same name, and most people will say oh I thought you was going to be ghetto, Monique is a black name...I wont even get into that.

Also there was a girl who I grew up with that "looked similar" and started calling herself by Monique because it was her middle name. Don't get my wrong she is beautiful inside and out, and we are good friends, but I want my own identity. In high school I was going to start going by Tiara, because that's my middle name which I've always loved more, but I chickened out. Now that I'm out of college I want to recreate a new identity or at least find my true self.

And we're left with "Mumbling Mermaid", why? Because I am, and always will be, in love with mermaids. I've always fantasized about being Ariel, shes my favorite, and there are a lot of similarities between our memoirs. Mumbling is one of my fatal flaws. I'm constantly repeating myself because I speak really fast, but very quietly. I'm such a shy person. Through this blog you'll be able to decode my rants, and people (well whom ever stumbled upon my blog) will finally GET ME!

Love you all,
Miss Tiara

Oh Heeyyyyyy

I'm Monique, a recent college graduate. Last semester I made a blog for class, but was forced to write boring intellectual posts. Well not necessarily forced, but I can't write about boy problems, menstrual cramps, or how to correctly save your V without getting razor bumps. Those posts would have been readily available for my teacher to see. YIKES!! And it's not that these were dire subjects I wanted to discuss, but what if? Yah know? Now I have all this free time on my hands and complete freedom to write about whatever whenever.

Welcome!
Monique Tiara